Private School Problems (part 1 of a 3 parter)

Hello my fellow crazies. My sympathetic moms and dads who barely remember the blur that was January.  Where have I been? Don't ask me, in my mind it's still November. But the calendar tells me different and my bank account shows the scars of a holiday season and fifth birthday party and thus I must admit that time is indeed passing. And what, pray tell, have we been up to?

Lorelei is adjusting quite well to the school environment. She's making friends and going to birthday parties and every few months or so I get to attend a PTA meeting where I am shamelessly guilted into giving even more money to the school for various improvements and fundraisers. They take off every conceivable holiday which means I am constantly looking for childcare options. Lorelei comes home reciting dogma that she cannot explain and I'm still having to explain to people the arbitrary laws that prohibit my well-read daughter from skipping this Letter-of-the-Week routine and skipping to Kindergarten or even 1st grade. Long story short- this is pretty much what I expected. However it's not all negative. In fact, let's take a look at the balance:

You can see the frustration. I'm sticking with the decision that Christ the King was the best choice given the circumstances, but I'm not too sure how sustainable it is for us in the long term. We have a few more months before summer vacation hits and that is putting the decisions into an even harsher perspective given that I've blown my whole childcare budget and still have two unaccounted for months to...well...account for!

The questions are endless and the issues mounting and time is running out.

Non Illegitimi Carborundum,

Bat Country

Mini-me

I forget what little mirrors these critters can be. Until I hear a sarcastic tone I didn't realize was in my voice echoed from my little monster. Or when Lorelei brings me a cool cloth for my head because she knows I'm not feeling well. Or when she sits at her desk studiously writing in her workbooks because she saw my working on countless spreadsheets. Of course I try not to cuss around her and I save the keggers for when she's sleeping over somewhere else (joking Nana), but I've come to realize that my good and bad habits are reflected through her in almost real time.

Routines are Flexible
Not too long ago we would come home and each plop in front of a TV; she watching cartoons and I HGTV. We ate somewhere in there and made our way to bed eventually. However, a couple of weeks ago, we came home and I forgot to turn the TV on. We had to walk the dog and get something out of the car and it just never came up. While taking trips outside, Lorelei made a dinner request, so we cooked together. When that was over it was bath time then bedtime and lo and behold we had completely missed Dora, Glee, Backyardigans, everything! And the Earth continued to turn. I didn't want to make a big thing of it so the next day I "forgot" to turn on the TV and plop and sure enough, we walked to the local beach and Lorelei splashed in the waves while I read my Kindle. A few more days of "forgetfullness" and we've completely changed our routine. We're eating better because I can focus on the task of preparing dinner while she takes care of the puppy and settles in (comfy clothes and all). The house is cleaner because I can do productive chores rather than my TV chores (I mean honestly, how many House Hunters must I watch?) Turns out, those ruts aren't so hard to break.

Gradulation (typo intentional)
I graduated from University of South Florida last Thursday with a BA in Psychology. I began courses in the Fall of 2003 and now, May of 2011 I finally made it to the cap and gown, traipse across the stage bit. I sat amidst kids who still thought it the ultimate rebellion to show up to graduation drunk or high. I posed for pictures with the college president whom I'd never met before but congratulated me as if she had been at my first grade pageant. And afterwards, my family and friends gathered to celebrate. The whole process was a bit surreal. As I walked across the stage, I looked up and could see Lorelei waving from a balcony. Truth be told, I spent most of the ceremony reading on my Kindle while the other 1,400 graduates each got their hands shaken. But when I saw her jumping up and down and waving, I lost it. My little girl. My baby who has her own duster so she can "clean like Mommy" and her own pots and pans so she can "cook like Mommy" and even had me cut her hair "short like Mommy" just saw Mommy graduate. Over the past 4 years Lorelei has watched Mommy do homework, study, take exams and go to classes. Now she wants to "gradulate just like Mommy".

Why "Bat Country"?

After several inquisitive and not so indirect comments about the title of my blog, I feel obliged to let ya'll in on a little secret. What is Bat Country and why would I name a blog about Home Schooling it?

We can't stop here...

Hunter S. Thompson. Granted not the role model most mothers have and I'm certainly not having Lorelei learn grammar from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, but there is a point to the quote I've chosen for this crazy mixed-up lifestyle. "We can't stop here, this is bat country". As Dr. Gonzo and Raul Duke are careening towards Las Vegas in Thompson's story-turned-Johnny Depp-movie, they are loaded up on so many mind-altering substances and drugs most of us have never before heard of, Duke starts to hallucinate. Hundreds of flying bats fill the sky while his "lawyer" tans himself in the passenger seat of their convertible. It's madness. It's hilarious, truer than most of us like to admit madness.

...this is bat country!

We all have our stories. Let's face it, we're all the star of our own movies. So I'm not going to claim that I've had a better or worse life than anyone else. I can say, though, that for me, it's been quite a ride and I'm just beginning. At this pace, God help me at 50. Life, parenthood, career, school, family, friends, love - very little of it is simple, none of it is easy and the best plan is to keep going. Keep moving, keep growing and improving and learning and failing and succeeding and traveling. I don't want to stop! Not here. Not when there is so much to do and see.

This isn't just a blog about Home Schooling. It's about living a life like no other. If that means freeing ourselves from regimented curriculum and arbitrary school calendars, then rock on. Lorelei is already getting a education beyond what VPK can give her. Let's learn by doing! Let's learn by trying and exploring.

Lorelei and I. This is our life. A life like no other; one that is constantly in motion and filled with love and adventure.

Juggling Life and Learning

I keep hearing and seeing these commercials about supermoms. There's the TBO.com one where the mom sings about all the different practices and pets and demands on her time. There's the one with the air freshener that freshens while you take care of kids and meet with your friends and watch movies. There's even one where the mom freezes time to enjoy her cup of coffee while her children dump juice on her pristine carpet and her husband thoughtlessly wrecks the living room with his neanderthal friends.
I can relate to none of these!

Life for me is much more like that Family Guy commercial with Stewie pestering Lois. After a long day of being pecked to death by chickens (or what you call "work") I go home to the woodepecker extraordinaire. And I must admit there are evenings when I'd rather turn on Cat and the Hat and escape to my nice, quiet room than drill Lorelei on how to say "Hello" in four langauges. (Believe it or not she can actually differentiate 'Bonjour' as 'French' and "Hola' as 'Spanish')

For all of you moms out there wringing your hands and straining your sanity, it's okay. Being Super Woman sometimes means getting the kids fed and not drop-kicking them out of the window. Then again, there are days when they surprise you.

Last night, my little learner structured her very own home school experience...for both of us. As I was dragging my tired, pecked-out rear home, she chirpily demanded to go to the YMCA. "But, honey, wouldn't you rather go home and order a pizza and watch Tinker Bell?" "Maybe later, Mommy" Who is this child and where did she come from? So, fine, we'll go but I'm not going to like it.

Once there, she promptly took over the game of toss in the Kid Zone and I felt obligated to memorize some of my favorite poems in French while treadmilling (it's a word now!). I felt better and learned the first stanza to Kipling's If in French. Score one for the little monster.

Finally home, I go to plop my sweatiness on the couch and little Miss L directs me to her desk where she insists on doing 10 workbook pages of Color by Number, Letters, Basic Addition and all other sorts of goodies. Seriously, what four year old chooses schoolwork over TV? Mine! And of course, I feel like a heel loafing in front of House Crashers so I guess I could get caught up on my own homework...

Of course we finally get to the point where it bed time and can you believe that little monster wants to cuddle? I mean, what's with cuteness? Here I am, totally set on having a meaningless waste of a night and she goes and ruins it with exercise and learning and family time. Moral of the story (oh yes, there is one): Being a family sometimes means dragging each other kicking and screaming in the right direction. Did I teach her that or did she teach me?

Now if only I could remind her of that when I prying her out of bed in the morning...

Toodles from Bat Country

Making everything a learning experience

One of the first fears I had about embarking on the Home Schooling of my poor unsuspecting little girl was that I was going to somehow warp her mind and stunt her growth by not teaching her whatever it is they teach in school. After reading countless blogs and books and articles and well-meaning posts I'm a little more comfortable with the "world as a classroom".


Turns out, everything we as adults take for granted is brand-spanking new to the little monster. All of a sudden, every little errand becomes a field trip and every mundane chore a lesson. Now I'm not saying every day is a picnic or I've turned into a Duggar, I'm just saying I think I'm really going to like spending time with my daughter that doesn't revolve around taking turns on who gets to pick the TV show.


A comparison of Kindergarten Math (30 minutes)


In school: Lorelei would be given a worksheet of triangles and squares, something akin to "square, square, triangle, square, square, ______" what comes next? Lorelei walks away with a gold star and secure in the knowledge that she can keep up with the rest of the class.


At home: While making lasagna, we discuss what our favorite ingredients are, Lorelei mixes learns the names of and mixes three different kinds of cheese, pick our fresh herbs from the garden, and determine a pattern of Noodles, Cheese, Vegetables, Sauce. While the lasagna cooks, we go on a little nature walk, learn about mushroom, read street signs, identify and pick flowers and discuss her day at the baby sitter's. At the table we decide squash is better the zucchini because yellow is prettier than green but both are good because they are healthy vegetables.


Home: 1 - School: 0


Farewell from Bat Country

Because I can...

Hello world. Not that any one's reading this yet but you will. I suppose I'll start with introductions.


My name is Amanda and I have no idea how I got here. Scratch that, I have a very good idea as to how I got here but I can't remember sitting down and plotting out my course to end up here. In fact, I don't remember plotting any course. Yesterday I was ditching Spanish II to walk down to McD's and today I'm writing curriculum notes to home school my daughter.

That about sums it up I suppose. But for those of you who like a little more information. I am a single (okay divorced but I hate saying it) mom of an amazing little girl who some days I want to drop kick. I work too hard for a national TV network (don't want to say who because I'm not really sure about legality and such).


Why am I blogging? Because after weeks of searching I have yet to find a truly helpful resource in single-parenting, fully-employed home schooling. Then there's the strange yet hard-won lessons of living 40 years in the span of 25 (I get a lot done in a day). That and I love to write but don't have the attention span (or time) for the Great American Novel.

So the hope is to a get a little something started. Some insights from the front line on what it's like to raise, support and teach a child while investing in your body, mind, soul and career.

If I haven't scared you away yet, welcome to the Great American Experiment. The new generation of movers and shakers.

Welcome to Bat Country